i'm learning to hear

deep down i knew He wanted me to stay. but i didn't. i didn't want to, so i went where i wanted. i thought it didn't really matter. i took the my-desires-are-His-desires approach (which a lot of times i agree with, but there are those times when that doesn't apply). He's always with me and will never leave me, but i think He can also be somewhere i'm not. like in sos when He invites her up the mountain, but she wants to stay under the apple tree. so He let's her, He doesn't force her to go, but He goes. yup, He went up the mountain and i decided to stay under the tree. bummer.

there's nothing better than to be where He wants you. where He invites you to go with Him. i've been there. and it is priceless. the peace that filled my heart was comparable to none.

i disobeyed and He forgives me. im so thankful that despite my weakness i really am feeling His delight and smile over me. i'm learning that His ways are better. i'm learning His voice. no matter what, go with that deep down feeling, even if it means you disappoint people or they think you're flakey. at the end of the day, it's just you and Him. and thats all that matters.

and the beautiful part is that He will invite us again. our rejecting Him won't negate His pursuit of us. He will have His way in our life. He will keep coming. He's a jealous bridegroom! hallelujah.